Overcoming Fear Of Failure And Reaching Goals

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Fear of failure is when we let that fear to stop us from achieving our goals and objectives, but is very important to learn how to overcome it. This kind of fear is most of the time irrational and continuous. People should find a way to overcome this kind of failure, since it may become the greatest obstacle to achieve the desired outcome, even when it comes to a certain outcome that may be very important to achieve.

Psychological reasons are also related to this kind of fear. Individuals may experience doubt and insecurity. The idea of not being able to accomplish different tasks or goals, make them not try at all. There are different ways that may help individuals overcome this fear, but only if they know in the first place what causes it. Having unrealistic expectations influences the idea that everything is achievable. It is a huge difference between being an actor and taking acting classes. When the time comes to face the reality, a lot of people deal with failure and this experience may shock them. It can sometimes also result in differencing them from trying new things. Worrying about abilities someone has in order to pursue the future they desire is another psychological characteristic of failure. If someone has experienced this feeling before, it becomes more difficult to move on and try again by setting new goals.

Often, we face the fear of failure. This makes us doubt our skills. After much effort and fatigue due to the obstacles that arise along the way, it seems to us, that we are not moving toward the realization of our goal but to the loss. Failures should not be taken very seriously and personal, because they are part of life which cannot be avoided. You should not let this feeling affect your self-esteem, and begin to consider yourself less capable. Rather than weaken you, failure can strengthen you, make you more experienced and wiser. When we think about the weaknesses that cause failure, we don’t take into consideration our strengths. People with high self-confidence try to identify strengths and successes before they worry about their weaknesses. Focusing on positive things and identifying more sustainable values, enables a more realistic vision for oneself.

You can try to imagine the worst possible scenario of that effort, and how much time it is needed to be healed from failure. Then you will understand that, it would certainly not be as terrible as you thought. Once you are released from fear and start taking the first steps to success, the most important thing is to continue them, regardless of the possible obstacles we may face. It is interesting how different individuals have different opinions on what they consider failure. Is giving up a definition of failure, or maybe not chasing you dreams? This is very important, in order to find the object of the obstacle towards success. We should use our strengths in our benefit, and also consider our real threats that oblige us take a step back. These kind of people tend to see every little thing as a threat due to the fact that failing is the only option to them. It is normal to expect a good outcome, but is very essential to not become attached to it. Some objectives involve persistence, while others require flexibility.

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Diane L. Karchner in her book “Losing the Mask” addresses her fears and puts them on display for the reader. It is very fundamental for her to let the audience know what it takes to overcome our fears. “At the end of my days, I don’t wish for any successes to be applauded, nor talents bragged about, as if that was all there was to me. Rather, I want my eulogy to read that I was `a woman who risked a lot, failed a lot, and always got back up.” (Karchner 2013)

Many adults face life by bearing the weight of fear of failure, which is ironic because learning to fail is almost an indispensable way to reach a final goal sought. Whenever it happens that many of us may have experienced the bitter taste of these experiences, each time we experience it, we seem to be touching the end of the world, but in fact they are just the beginning of a full-filled path and opportunity unexpected, that in most cases are more interesting than the first one.

Do you remember how you learned to walk when you were little kids. Did you suddenly raise from the bed, and have you walked right out of your room without making the slightest mistake? If it were so, it would not seem very credible in fact. Many of us, of course, have learned to walk slowly by falling hundreds of times. We got up, we made a step and fell down again. So it has been since we were little, got up and fell again until we could take two steps.

Failing, sometimes, makes us really good as we learn how to be more inspired, motivated, and grown-up, finding ways to open new doors to face the most beautiful realities. Ultimately, let’s acknowledge that continuing success unconsciously gives the feeling of self-satisfaction, in many cases more than it should. So, and if we fail, we realize that sometimes we have to stand on the ground. Failure remains an experience that has its value, and improved us somehow.

After a bitter experience, we usually become more brave. Fear of trying things keeps people frozen, but when the loss becomes part of them, the feeling of fear seems to go away. Courage does not actually come from being a victor, but from achieving goals, whether it succeeds to succeed or not. Trying more chances will build your lack of courage, gaining more ‘rights’ and opportunities.    

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