Right Or Wrong Writing On Personality

I will never forget sitting on a chair, it was dark, it was cold, it was winter season in Nepal and I was questioning on my writing. I was looking for a scholarship and for that, I had taken some test, but my test did not get as respectable as I had thought about it. My test scores were not sufficient as much that I could get the scholarship and I thought that the only way to get the scholarship was through my essay. At night, I sat on the chair with a pen and paper to write the application essay. I went through each of the questions of the essay to pick up one and start writing on it. Initially, I felt, it might be easy to write about yourself “Who you are as a person”, but I got stocked. I had lots of things to explain my personality, but I was not able to write down the even a single sentence. Even I lacked the vocabulary to explain about myself. I tried my best to start my application essay. Finally, at midnight, I wrote down a couple of sentences, but still, I was questioning myself whether my writing was going to pay off or not. My head was killing me because of tension. At that moment, I was treating myself as a complete failure because I did not have good test scores as my friends and even I was not able to start my application essay. I was so tired that I did not know when I got slept.

I still remember that day when I wake up early in the morning to start my application essay, but still, I could not understand that what am I supposed to write down at the beginning of my essay, middle of my essay? How can I conclude my essay effectively? I dig my bed to find out the laptop and start searching for several ways of writing an effective application essay. I downloaded several books, novels and even I ended on buying a couple of books for getting the reference for writing the application essay.

I started reading each book to get the reference in writing the application essay. Even I ended up going to my advisor to get some tips on writing the essay. She told me that writing is not a bunch of words. It takes some time and effort. She told me to give at least one months’ time to write the application essay. She told me to think critically about it and then start writing on it. She wanted me to bring my critical thinking quality while writing the application essay. She asked me to write a hook sentence at the beginning of the sentence like an anecdote, dichotomy so that it would grab reader attention and asked me to connect each paragraph effectively. Besides that, she asked me to not to use words like in conclusion, summary, as a result, while concluding the essay. Since it was international scholarship, she asked me to check grammatical errors, tones, consistency, etc. After a week, I started brainstorming about application essay question. I asked my family members, my advisor, my friends about myself Initially I thought to explain my qualities, but I did not find much more to explain about it. While I was writing the essay, my sister was watching a movie on Youtube and at the same time, I heard the news of an earthquake. That news led me to think and write my own experience of the earthquake. It was not as easy as I thought about it, but still, I tried to write down free writing on it. I did it, but it went to four pages. I had lots of things to explain my experience of the earthquake. I wrote my experience in my application, but my application lacked the description of my personality. I was unable to express who I am as a person. I gave my full time in making my application perfect. Besides these all, I was also making sure that my application essay did no grammatical errors and tone that might affect other. I checked my sentence structured, parallelism, modifiers, etc. Every day, I used to make a draft, but still, I came up with questions whether my essay was going to paid off or not. By giving two months, I completed my application essay and finally with the final draft, I went to my advisor for proofreading thinking that my application essay might not contain any mistakes, but I had done one of the greatest mistake: plagiarism. I had used lots of sources to make my application essay effective. I had used some quotes, but I did not give the credit for it. I did my best to remove plagiarism from my essay. I was done with my application essay, but still, I had the threat of losing the scholarship. I waited till last moment: deadline and on the day, I submitted my application for the scholarship with kind of threat of losing the scholarship. I had already said to my parents that I might not be able to get scholarships. I still remember that stormy day, I was waiting for my result, I had received a thin envelope and I thought that thin courier is not a good sign. I opened it and there was my scholarship letter and it was my acceptance. I ran with screaming to inform my parents. I was so happy that I read each sentence of that letter. I nailed it. I did receive the scholarship. I had proved that scores did not matter while getting scholarships.

The success of scholarship enables me to write more and more. During my journey of literacy development, I studied several books and novels and among them, Carl Sagan books inspired me most. Being an astronomer, he wrote six hundred scientific paper and more than twenty books. I still remember the day when I got the book “The Dragons of Eden” written by Carl Sagan. After studying the book where he had measure the human intelligence quantitively, my eagerness for writing grow stronger thinking that human is more intelligent than anyone in the world. Every day, I used to write the essay on new topics and used to show my advisor to get feedback. My passion for writing gets stronger and stronger when my advisor told me about the theory of Forms. “Ideas were far more real than the natural world” helped to develop my critical thinking. From that day, I started thinking critically before I used to write any essay.

I wrote down several poems that were posted in my college magazine. I wrote down several essays speech, but I do not stop question in my writing. Questioning on my writing has led me to new levels of fear and uncertainty, but this questioning is not going to stop.