The Importance of Loyalty Over Love: My Perspective

In this essay, I will discuss the importance of loyalty by its luxury, how it provides emotional stability and security that all can be found through human character. At the age of 5, I learned that sharing my toys and playing with other kids was what a true friendship felt like. There was no sense of trust, no sense of loyalty. Instead, there was that bond of love that I was able to form with others through these objects that we would bring to the table. My mother has always told me that “sharing is caring, and caring is love.” This bond of “love” felt like I was on top of the world with all the other kids by my side. As time passed, the friendships I have formed would gradually die out because of how my toys were beginning to lack the excitement it used to have, and my friends would eventually leave me for someone else with brand new toys. From there, I was able to observe that any form of love can be undone, no matter the circumstances in the relationship. Fast forwarding to present time, I have developed a deep understanding of what love really is. The word “love” has been thrown out so blandly to the point it has lost its meaning in many different relationships. I have lost many friendships and relationships – some expected and some not – even when love was still present. Therefore now, when building new relationships with people, I sought for loyalty over love. 

What is loyalty to me?

Loyalty itself is recognized as an attribute of people who can be described as having a strong sense of support towards something or someone, also known as forming an allegiance. One can be described as having loyalty to their alma mater, or in a different context a loyalty in their personal relationship.

Loyalty to me is genuinely having the best interests of others at heart and ensuring that the relationship is reciprocated. It cannot be defined in explicit terms as it is too broad, but it is surely identifiable. It may apply to a person, a family, a group, a business, a country, etc. Loyalty involves obedience, sacrifice and compassion in human character; it forms the basis of an ideal human character. Loyalty is based on sincerity and boldness in nature. 

Understanding the Importance of Loyalty

In today’s society, the importance of loyalty has been overlooked because of how we were conditioned to think that love is the answer to a perfect life. From the movies we watch, to the books we read, to the songs we hear, love is a beautiful thing, but is it really the key to true happiness? For instance, Hallmark films give us an idea of what love should look like: a struggling single mother, or a lonely fiancé in her relationship that each meet a guy they eventually fall in love with. Although these women found the love of their life and lived happily ever after, the reality of these events can only happen in dreams (if you got to feel this way, you are one lucky person). These types of films give us an idea of otherworldly love. Nowadays, people often secure their relationships through the gifting of designer bags, expensive wedding rings or bribery of money and call it love. Loyalty has become a luxury that not many can afford to obtain. One’s loyalty grows overtime, but it can also deteriorate––it all depends on how a person reacts on a situation. I once had a best friend that decided to pick someone else as a partner for a project, and I was left with myself to work with. Her way of apologizing was to buy many of my favorite things, but it did not make me feel any better. This is an example of why loyalty is more important than love. You could hold someone so close to your heart, but once you have your back faced on them, their true intentions become clear. Money can buy happiness, but money can never buy loyalty.

Over the course of time, the subject of love has become a dreadful topic for most people to have a conversation about. If you could sit with your friend and ask what they think of love, they might come up with a negative response to it. This is because of the presence of betrayal in a relationship, friendship and even in a business. Betrayal is the act of exposing someone to danger by revealing secrets or information, or even the act of deception in order to get what they want (Oxford Dictionary). Love becomes tainted and can no longer function as a positive aspect. Again, this would be another example of why loyalty is more important than love. Loyalty can improve one’s emotional stability. The presence of loyalty in a relationship, friendship and in business can reduce the amount of stress and anxiety. Who would want to stress out on thinking whether or not a person loves you?

There is a saying I once heard before, it goes like “Relationships are like gardens––you need to put in the work if you want them to grow healthy and strong.” A lot of people do not realize that loyalty is the most important part of any relationship. It builds security, it fosters a variety of qualities of a long bond such as trust, vulnerability, and honesty. Of course, loyalty does not grow overnight. It can take a lot of time, work and a bit of reassurance. The security that loyalty brings is what builds and creates a support system for you, your partner, friend, or just your personal life in general. You could be told that you are loved by your best friend, but still get backstabbed. This is why loyalty is more important than love. Loyalty brings out the unity and partnership which provides you a sense of belonging that you deserve. It is less likely that you are to going to feel like the world is against you when you have people who are loyal to you.

Conclusion

In conclusion, loyalty is a lot more important than love because an atmosphere of trust is more reliable than an atmosphere of extreme feelings that go beyond time, space and reality. It must be earned and nurtured over time. You can force love but you cannot force loyalty. Understanding what is important to someone, how they wanted to be treated, respecting their choices and supporting it are what being loyal is all about. Love can be a beautiful feeling, but that feeling will fade away if there is no loyalty.

Works Cited

1. Jin, Wang. “The Deeper the Love, the Deeper the Hate.”