The Self Help And Esteem System For Women

According to O'Brien, women who said yes tended to be more valued in the workplace, while those who turned down requests received worse performance reviews and fewer recommendations for promotions, and they were also less well liked. Other research has shown that when women act assertively in pursuit of their interests, which could include saying no, they are punished by both men and women for violating gender stereotypes (O’Brien). Asserting myself does not exist, and I usually end up taking on way more than I should, which has resulted in, as Joyce Russell said, exhaustion and feelings of deprivation in sleep, emotional support, physical energy, and time to myself, as well as feeling empty and resentful. All of these things over time have been really hard on my self-esteem. 

Self-esteem is my own opinion of my value and how well I can do things. Having low self-esteem causes me to have an irrational belief system about myself. Which leads to thoughts of unworthiness and that I am not good enough. Shyness is also linked to low self-esteem. People with low self-esteem do not stand up for their own rights or trust their own feelings or their worth as a person. This can be a big load to carry around, especially when I need to make a point. If I do not feel good about myself, how can I speak up for myself? The good news is that I can build up my self-esteem one step at a time by learning to become more assertive, even in small ways. From the article 'Speaking Up for Yourself,' A big part of being assertive is thinking through a problem situation before you act. starting with short-term goals, I can learn to be more comfortable with myself and more confident. One way to boost my self-esteem and learn to assert myself more would be to try different ways to get what I need. For example, if I am having difficulty in a class I can ask my teacher for help, and each time I ask for what I need it will get easier. 

Another thing that can help would be to remember that I do not have to take on the responsibility of other people’s feelings and/or behavior (Lindsay). I should accept that I can be responsible only for my own thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. It is not my responsibility to protect other people's feelings, nor is it fair to neglect my needs in order to keep others happy. If someone chooses to react angrily to something I say, assuming I have behaved fairly, the other person's anger is their responsibility. I have no right to feel responsible or guilty. The process of becoming more assertive will take time, but it is something that I will strive for daily. By reading all these articles, I have learned that it is ok to stand up and speak in a tactful way. Believing in myself and knowing my worth is a great thing, and I do not have to apologize for it. Learning better communication skills and being around more people instead of isolating myself will help a lot. This project has helped open the door to healing, learning more about myself, and knowing that I have what it takes to overcome this communication issue. I have a voice, and I should not be afraid to use it to help me or to help others along the way.