The Question Of Whether Age Matters In A Relationship

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The issue of age factor in a relationship is a serious one. I believe you might have thought about it either once or twice. I can’t date him, I am older than him. He was born a week after I was born and all of that. But should age be a factor or criteria in choosing who to date or marry? It is a big problem I tell you, especially if you have been there before. Well, let’s be on neutral ground and a wee bit personal, as both cases have its pros and cons.

But is it the age factor we should be so worried about? What about other attributes? What about the level of maturity? Can you both agree on some certain grounds? The truth is that going into a relationship should be built on strong and valuable reasons and not just one reason of age. The reasons must be deeply rooted and not superficial.

One would say, as long we love each other and there is happiness, nothing else matters. But this is blindness. You cannot build a relationship alone on the ground of love and happiness; it needs a lot of work to keep it together. Likewise, the age factor shouldn’t be the sole reason for considering going into a relationship.

My point is, when in a dilemma about deciding to date someone you are younger or older than, you should see from different light and perspective and you shouldn’t just make a decision based on their age alone. Is he or she mature enough to handle a relationship? Can he or she love? Do we share a similar interest? Do we agree on some grounds? Do we have the same philosophy about life? Can we be together and not get bored? Do we share the same belief? When you ponder on those questions above, then you will realize that age matters so little. Let’s explore some common reasons and mistake people have made about age factor in a relationship

Some ladies can’t simply wrap their head around the fact that the man they want to date or marry is younger than they are. She feels cheated respecting such a man. They would say: How can I submit to a man who I am twice older than? How can I respect a man who is the same age as my younger brother at home? But we are not supposed to respect people because of age but because they are people and they deserve to be respected.

They Believe Age Is Wisdom And Maturity

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Tradition and custom have made most ladies believe that dating or getting married to a younger man is out of place, they feel that getting married to a man older than they are is maturity. They see a man older than them as being experienced and matured, unlike younger men who more likely to flirt around with other ladies. They see advance men as being wise and capable of meeting their needs. But hardly could this be true.

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Age Is Just A Number And Not A Yard Stick For Compatibility

Before we begin, is age just a number? Well, that’s something to ponder on. Nonetheless, age does not equate to maturity or compatibility. We see young people with a great mind and maturity. Also, there are advance people who lake maturity and common sense of reasoning.

On the flip side, age could be a factor to look after when the age range is wide. For instance, an interval of 20 years is not ideal. No, not in this generation. They feel younger men are not yet established especially those with the same age group. But age is not a factor that tells us if a guy is rich or not or if a guy is going to be rich or not in the future. We just look at value and extent of maturity regardless of its age; either young or old. Can he accommodate a woman not just in money or financial capacity but in emotional capacity; Being able to love, Being able to be committed and not considering age as the man factor?

Traditions And Customs Age-Gap Couple Phenomenon

The issue of age in a relationship could be traced back to tradition and customs. This is predominant in African countries. They believe that a man and a woman shouldn’t be of the same age. Most likely the man ought to be the eldest. We feel that age is maturity. We feel that age is wisdom. But I tell you this is hardly the truth. There is no evidence for it.

Why Some Ladies Are Attracted To Older Men

Men and woman have different priorities when it comes to the subject of relationship or marriage. While men place more priority on loyalty and trustworthiness when searching for a lady to settle down, women on the other hand place more priority on status and resources. Why is this?

Women think in this light because, being the child-bearer and home keeper and all that, they are saddled with a huge responsibility and their investments such as time, effort in raising children are high they wouldn’t like to settle down for less. They would want to settle down looking for a partner who will invest resources to meet her need in a relationship and family. It is commonly believed that building resources take time. And as we get older we tend to acquire more resources later in life to be able to cater to someone else comfortably. So women get attuned to the fact that older men have almost what it takes to suffice for their need.

On a final note, the true success of a relationship hinges on the degree to which both partners share similar values, beliefs, ideology, goals and vision about their relationship; support each other and assisting each other to achieve their goals; promoting relationship commitment, trust and intimacy; and resolving problem constructively. These entire factors have little to do with the age factor.   

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