The Psychological and Political Factors of Infidelity and Adultery

It is often said that, in the case of infidelity, once a cheater, always a cheater. Infidelity is a moral dilemma for people involved in extradyadic relations because it undermines the foundation of trust and love established between partners, as well as violates the social contract between intimate partners of having no other partners outside of the current relationship. What personal and situational factors lead a person to willingly have an extradyadic affair outside of their current relationship? In what circumstances does cheating apply? Some people define infidelity as a sexual or physical relationship that is performed with someone else that is not their current partner. However, an affair can either be emotional or sexual. And other cultures define infidelity differently than western countries do. Government measures intended to curb the desire and punish those who commit adultery emulate the moral codes and cultural attitudes a culture upholds to regulate the populace. This paper will explore the phenomenon of infidelity as a breach of moral ethics in relationships and marriages through the disciplines of psychology, political science, and cultural and ethnic studies.

Psychology

Unfaithfulness is a multidimensional problem that often destroys relationships and marriages, and resolutions are often sought out by marriage counselors or therapists. Internal factors—such as stress, boredom, and marital dissatisfaction—are some of the top reasons why some individuals commit infidelity; other stressors, like busy work hours, children, and emotional neglect, can also play a role. (Allen et al., 2005, p. 1374) According to a General Social Survey, data revealed that “men (20%) [were] more likely than women (13%) to cheat … while married.” (Wang, 2018) However, a strong factor of age influences the predisposition for infidelity. During the later stages in life, 60 and above, the infidelity rates reach the highest among men at 26%. (Wang, 2018) Another factor is the “generation or cohort effect” due to fact that men and women during the 1940s and 1950s were “coming of age during the sexual revolution,” and thus had increased rates of extramarital affairs. (Wang, 2018) Other social and demographic factors contributed to infidelity. African American men (28%) report with the highest rate of infidelity among white men (20%) and Hispanic men (16%). Additional background factors, such as political and religious affiliations, education level, and family background affect an individual’s susceptibility to cheat. For instance, people who grew up in unstable homes, possess democratic ideologies, are college-educated, or rarely attended religious services were found more likely to cheat on their partners. (Wang, 2018)

While most couples resort to disseminating a relationship, others turn to therapy or behavioral couples counseling to confront the infidelity, evaluate possible external options, and initiate the healing process. In this setting, couples—guided by the therapist—to make endeavors to repair the damages and rebuild their relationship. Allen et al. (2005) discusses that the objective of this treatment for couples is to clarify the interconnected factors that led to the infidelity. In the initial stage of treatment, one person is more willing whereas the other person has an ambivalent or distressed approach. Therapists tend to use numerous theoretical approaches to suit each couple, such as feeling-based or cognitive behavioral therapy. Empirical research reveals that adulterous couples display signs of improvement than couples where cheating isn’t involved. (Allen et al., 2005, 1376) Furthermore, couples who were open about their infidelity experienced higher levels of marital satisfaction. Allen et al. (2005) noted that, at the conclusion of treatment, couples reacted forgivingly to the infidelity.

Political Science

The earliest body of laws from 1754 B. C. Mesopotamia, known as the Code of Hammurabi, contained an outline of various regulations, including marriage laws, especially measures forbidding extramarital relationships outside of marriage, as well as the ensuing punishments. A set of laws addressing the social structure of Mesopotamia society ruled if a woman partook in an affair, then she would be executed by drowning.” (Duhaime, 2014) These laws reflected the cultural values and time period of each society. Oftentimes, infidelity became the grounds for divorce, as was the case for Henry VIII in 1542 when he charged his former wife Katharine Howard with adultery. (Duhaime, 2014) Subsequently, she was beheaded. Sharia, or Muslim law, that dominates in most Islamic countries indicate the evident gender bias and decimation against women and girls. Adulterous women are bestowed harsher penalties than their male counterparts, which includes “flogging, stoning, and hanging.” (Rhode, 2016) The prevalent social viewpoints in both the United States and Taiwan are rooted in their rigid social and political history. Colonial New England, for example, outlined a rigid law and order system implemented by Puritan colonists. Strict marriage laws deemed adultery, especially for women, a “capital offense.” (Miller, 2018, p. 425) Adultery was considered a “civil injury” to a husband if another man, willingly or through coercion, had intimate relations with another man’s wife. (Miller, 2018, p. 429) Confucian philosophies in ancient Taiwan dominated over family dynamics. Concubinage was a regular practice, but extradyadic relations were “legally enforceable rationales for divorce”; even so, Confucian ideologies cited that women maintain loyalty to their husbands despite their infidelities. (Miller, 2018, p. 437)

In the United States, adultery was decriminalized in 1962, but claims of emotional distress caused by a spouse’s adultery became valid grounds for divorce in thirty states. (Miller, 2018, p. 431) In American court cases, adultery not only affected the emotional well-being of the afflicted spouse but affected property rights. For instance, the unfaithful spouse is liable to pay child support and alimony to their aggrieved partner as compensation. Some courts can deny the cheating spouse custody if they are proven morally unfit or if the infidelity had an adverse impact on the child. (Miller, 2018, p. 433) A wave of feminism hit 1930s Taiwan, where feminist advocates called for legislative changes for the biased Article 239, an adultery provision which condemned “polygamy and adultery” yet tolerated concubinage. (Miller, 2018, p. 439) Thus, a reformed law was created to legally criminalize infidelity. Women regarded this as a vital asset safeguarding their economic survival and maintain child support from their unfaithful husbands. They posited that general male-dominant attitudes of honor would force them to “lose money or property [rather] than face the disgrace of a criminal record.” (Miller, 2018, p. 440)

Cultural and Ethnic Studies

Studies have shown that a strict adherence to honor correlates to higher rates of intimate partner violence in Latino culture. (Vandello and Cohen, 2003, p. 998) Honor cultures are characterized by firm familial ties and the importance of adhering to gender roles. In these honor cultures, displaying aggression or violence resembles strength and pride. Aggression can also be a tool to restore a family’s honor or image in the community. In Latino culture, machismo is defined as the traditional male role of dominance, aggression, and strength. Women were expected to be modest, loyal, and self-sacrificing for the family. Even today, most Latina women follow some aspects of the conventional gender script. Evidently, these aspects of family and gender honor can affect Latina women’s chances of reaching out to special agencies trained in domestic violence. (Vandello and Cohen, 2003, p. 1003)

Honor-driven domestic violence is often spurred by grudges or offenses aimed at tarnishing an individual’s or a family’s reputation. In the instance of infidelity, if a woman was caught talking or socializing with a man other than her husband, she would be subjected to intense scrutiny by her community, as well as experience abuse by her husband. According to Vandello and Cohen (2003), honor cultures are accustomed to view domestic abusers in a positive light if their actions were “well-intentioned”, that is, were provocations brought on by dishonoring one’s personal or familial reputation. (Vandello and Cohen, 2003, p. 1005) Additionally, these same honor cultures disapproved of seeking out professional treatment for honor-related domestic violence; conversely, women who remained married to their abusive husbands rather than divorcing or leaving him were received positively by others. (Vandello and Cohen, 2003, p. 1005)

Self-Reflection

Prior to my investigative research into cheating, my overall comprehension stemmed from ignorance on the issue. The recent scandal between Jordyn Woods and Tristan Thompson produced gossip and outrage from the general audience, in which Woods received more hostility for the affair compared to her partner in crime. People took to media platforms, such as Twitter, to voice their mixed opinions. Aside from the vitriolic criticisms that painted her as a temptress, others had pointed out the evident gender discrimination. In general, women are condemned for their promiscuity and sexual freedom than men are. This event inspired me to explore this taboo and examine the intersectional factors that come into play.

The demographics outlined by Wang (2018) and Vandello and Cohen (2003) were especially informative of adultery’s adverse impact on an interpersonal and communal level. Cultures with gendered scripts perpetuate sexism and discriminatory behavior towards women, including those who don’t follow the traditional demure, virginal expectation. Factors such as ethnicity, religious background, political affiliation, education level, employment history, behavioral attitudes, cultural values, and life experiences shape an individual’s, and by extension, a society’s outlook on cheating. I firmly believe infidelity is a personal choice that ultimately leads to regret and heartbreak. To remedy the issue, couples employ professional help via therapy and counseling to construct beneficial ways of repairing the relationship or breaking up on amicable terms. I hope to become an unbiased individual in the future where I hold both the man and woman equally accountable for their adultery.

Conclusion

The reasons for infidelity are as complex as the person who chooses to be unfaithful. Judiciary intervention has led to the creation of laws forbidding and punishing extramarital affairs with the goal to maintain order within the community. Modern progressive philosophies still combat antiquated ideologies based on gender, where women are ostracized more than their male counterparts. The studies provided by the journal articles acknowledge adultery as a symptom of wider issue on a personal level between a couple.