Forms Of Marriage: Love Or Arranged Marriage For Happiness

Abstract

Our topic for research is marriage and forms of marriage. The dynamic concept of marriage will be explained. Marriage is a fundamental institution without which no union between man and woman is recognised. The paper would include perspectives of various philosophers on marriage as well as their criticism. Various examples will be taken up and will be explained which shows that how people are greatly influenced by the social conduct that is expected of them and are also so habituated to the stereotypical image of marriage that they do not feel the need to explore the more multi-dimensional concept of marriage. Towards the end of a research paper, we can arrive at a conclusion whether the various forms of marriages conducted in different parts of the world gain social or religious acceptance. We will explore the different forms of marriages including monogamy, polygamy,polyandry, etc and see how they affect society at large. Marriage is a multidimensional and evolving concept in modern times because the types of marriages keep changing from generation to generation. The type, functions and characteristics of marriage vary from culture to culture and can change over time. In the 21st century, monogamy was considered to be formally and legally recognised form of marriage which was solemnized by cultural and religious ceremonies. Any deviation from the above mentioned approved marriage such as homosexuality, open marriages and live in relationships were severely frowned upon. But now times are changing and marriages that were once considered illegal and abnormal are now being accepted in most parts of the world.

Introduction

Like all creatures and mammals, human beings too mate and procreate. They raise and rear their families till such time that they become independent and are capable of taking care of themselves. Humans, however, are organised in their way of producing and raising children. They first have to adhere to social norms laid down by society and undergo a religious ceremony called marriage. The word 'marriage' derives from Middle English mariage, which first appears in 1250–1300 CE. This in turn is derived from Old French, marier (to marry), and ultimately Latin, marītāre, meaning to provide with a husband or wife and marītāri meaning to get married.Marriage is defined as a legal and social union between an adult man and a woman in which the couple can freely indulge in a sexual relationship.

The Concise Oxford Dictionary of Sociology (1994) defines it as, ‘Marriage is traditionally conceived to be legally recognized relationship, between an adult male and female, that carries certain rights and obligations.’ Legalized marriage between an adult male and female is called heterosexual marriage.Illegal sexual relationship between a man and a woman does not confer any rights to the couple. Universally all people are empowered with certain rights which permit them to get married to any person of their free and individual choice. Article 16 of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights declares that 'Men and women of full age, without any limitation due to race, nationality or religion, have the right to marry and to found a family. They are entitled to equal rights as to marriage, during marriage and at its dissolution. Marriage shall be entered into only with the free and full consent of the intending spouses. Marriage means the legally of formally recognised union of a man and a woman as partners in a personal relationship. When two people make a public pledge of commitment to live together and share their lives in a way that it is legally, socially and religiously recognised.

The concept of marriage

Westermarck (1891) defines marriage ‘as a relation of one or more men to one or more women, which is recognized by custom or law, and involves rights and duties both in the case of the parties entering the union and in the case of children born of it’. Giddens (1997) states, ‘Marriage can be defined as a socially recognized relationship and approved sexual union between an adult male and female, that carries certain rights and obligations.’

The definition of marriage varies around the world not only between cultures and religion but also throughout the history of any given culture and religion. It is principally and institution where sanction is given to have sexual intimacy.Marriage is defined as a legal contract which is approved by society as religious practices. In olden times societies needed a secure environment for the perpetuation of the species, a system of rules to handle the granting of property rights and the protection of bloodlines. The institution of marriage handled these needs. The main goal of marriage was to act as an alliance between families.

In the olden times marriages were arranged, not because the couple was in love but for economic reasons and the people involved had no say in the matter.The bond of a legal marriage connects the two adult individuals. It also connects all the relatives on either side of the family to each other.After marriage several statuses like brother -in -law, father -in -law, mother-in -law, sister in law come into being.

According to the decree of society, a marriage requires other religious sanction or a civil sanction or both. Once a couple has undergone the ceremony of marriage they are legally recognised as husband and wife in the society and hence they can produce children by wedlock. They can make love to each other which satisfies their biological, ethical and social needs that couple develops love and regard for each other and respect each others individuality.Although marriage takes place between an adult man and a woman, in western countries, the legal age of marriage is falling dramatically. Many adolescents are now entering matrimony.In India, child marriages are allowed by the custom of certain societies but this is an illegal and not recognised by the law.

Marriage differs from the contemporary concept of live in relationship. The former is a traditional age old concept, while the latter is a new one. Hence we can say that marriage has evolved over the years.More and more young people are maintaining unmarried lifestyles and pairing up by being in a live in relationship. Moreover, they can always move in with another partner if they do not wish to limit their sexual intimacy. Some unmarried couples have no desire to produce children and this trend has caught up with both men and women because it is not viewed as a social taboo any longer.

A marriage does not mean that it should be performed to satisfy only carnal and sexual pleasures. Then the very meaning of marriage becomes reduced to a subrational level for the desire for sexual satisfaction. A man and woman after marriage or two parts of a complete whole.Casual intercourse is just meant to satisfy one's sexual needs but that cannot create a family. Mere sexual relations between a man and a woman does not constitute a marriage. As a married couple the man and woman relationship acquires the legality of marriage where they are expected to follow the norms of certain rights and duties. They are regarded as next of kin to their respective spouses.

Understanding Marriage: The historical orientation by various philosophers:-

The concept of marriage differs among various philosophers. Many of the philosophers even criticize the very institution of marriage itself. Some of the others advocate the need for the reformation of the traditional marriage concept.

In his depiction of the ideal state, Plato (427–347 BCE) described a form of marriage contrasting greatly with actual marriage practices of his time. He argued that, just as male and female watch dogs perform the same duties, men and women should work together, and, among Guardians, ‘wives and children [should be held] in common’ (The Republic, ca. 375–370 BCE, 423e–424a). To orchestrate eugenic breeding, temporary marriages would be made at festivals, where matches, apparently chosen by lot, would be secretly arranged by the Rulers. Resulting offspring would be taken from biological parents and reared anonymously in nurseries. Plato's reason for this radical restructuring of marriage was to extend family sympathies from the nuclear family to the state itself: the abolition of the private family was intended to discourage private interests at odds with the common good and the strength of the state (ibid., 449a-466d; in Plato's Laws, ca. 355–47 BCE, private marriage is retained but still designed for public benefit). Aristotle (384–322 BCE) sharply criticized this proposal as unworkable.

In sharp contrast to the ancients, whose philosophical discussion of sex and sexual love was in no way confined to marriage, Christian philosophers introduced a new focus on marriage as the sole permissible context for sex, marking a shift from viewing marriage as primarily a political and economic unit. St. Augustine (354–430), following St. Paul, condemns sex outside marriage and lust within it. “[A]bstinence from all sexual union is better even than marital intercourse performed for the sake of procreating,” and the unmarried state is best of all (The Excellence of Marriage, ca. 401, §6, 13/15). But marriage is justified by its goods: “children, fidelity [between spouses], and sacrament.” Although procreation is the purpose of marriage, marriage does not morally rehabilitate lust. Instead, the reason for the individual marital sexual act determines its permissibility. Sex for the sake of procreation is not sinful, and sex within marriage solely to satisfy lust is a pardonable (venial) sin. As marital sex is preferable to “fornication” (extra-marital sex), spouses owe the “marriage debt” (sex) to protect against temptation, thereby sustaining mutual fidelity (Marriage and Desire, Book I, ca. 418–19, §7, 8, 17/19, 14/16).St. Thomas Aquinas (ca. 1225–1274) grounded concurring judgments about sexual morality in natural law, explicating marriage in terms of basic human goods, including procreation and fidelity between spouses (Finnis 1997). Monogamous marriage, as the arrangement fit for the rearing of children, “belong[s] to the natural law.” Monogamous marriage secures paternal guidance, which a child needs; fornication is thus a mortal sin because it “tends to injure the life of the offspring.” (Aquinas rejects polygamy on similar grounds while, like Augustine, arguing that it was once permitted to populate the earth.). Aquinas emphasizes the mutual fidelity of the spouses, including payment of the “marriage debt” and “partnership of a common life”—a step towards ideas of companionate marriage (Summa Theologiae, Supp. 49, 1).

John Stuart Mill (1806–1873) argued that women's subordination within marriage originated in physical force—an anomalous holdover of the ‘law of the strongest’. Like Wollstonecraft in her 1792 A Vindication of the Rights of Woman, Mill compared marriage and slavery: under coverture wives had no legal rights, little remedy for abuse, and, worse, were required to live in intimacy with their ‘masters’. This example of an inequality based on force had persisted so long, Mill argued, because all men had an interest in retaining it. Mill challenged the contractual view that entry into marriage was fully voluntary for women, pointing out that their options were so limited that marriage was “only Hobson's choice, ‘that or none’” (The Subjection of Women, 1869, 29).

Feminist philosophers have seen marriage as playing a crucial role in women's oppression and thus a central topic of justice.While many feminists have focused on the reform of marriage, others have argued for its abolition (Chambers 2013). In The Second Sex, feminist philosopher Simone de Beauvoir (1908–86) identified the expectations surrounding marriage as one of the primary means by which women are socialized into a femininity which, in her view, was limiting: marriage “is the destiny traditionally offered to women by society” (de Beauvoir 1949 [1989], 425), leading women to focus on their attractiveness as mates—and not on study, career, or other ambitions.

Homosexuality and marriage

Marriage provides benefits which are denied to same-sex couples on the basis of their orientation; if the function of marriage is the legal recognition of loving, or “voluntary intimate,” relationships, the exclusion of same-sex relationships appears arbitrary and unjustly discriminatory (Wellington 1995, 13).Same-sex relationships are relevantly similar to heterosexual relationships recognized as marriages, yet the state denies gays and lesbians access to the benefits of marriage, hence treating them unequally (Mohr 2005, Rajczi 2008, Williams 2011).Same-sex relationships are relevantly similar to heterosexual relationships recognized as marriages, yet the state denies gays and lesbians access to the benefits of marriage, hence treating them unequally (Mohr 2005, Rajczi 2008, Williams 2011).

According to the definition of marriage, it is a union of an adult male and adult female were permitted to have sex after that become man and wife following religious ceremony.But this confuses meaning and reference. Past applications of a term need not yield necessary and sufficient criteria for applying it: ‘marriage’, like ‘citizen’, may be extended to new cases without thereby changing its meaning (Mercier 2001). However, same sex marriages have now come into prominence where two people of the same sex or gender, enter into a civil or religious ceremony. In many countries of the world same sex marriages have been legalized whereas in several of the countries it has been banned and such a concept is considered as a violation of the matrimonial laws. It has now come to realise that sexual preference has been biologically determined. There should not be discrimination against them because homosexuality is an unalterable aspect of the identity. Love and fidelity do exist in homosexual marriages where the partners are committed to each other.Homosexuality is also on the rise in most parts of the world in several countries these alliances are considered illegal. A liberal state should not choose amongst the various ways (compatible with justice) individuals wish to organize sex and intimacy. Thus, the state should recognize a diversity of marital relationships—including polygamy (Calhoun 2005, Mahoney 2008) or else privatize marriage, relegating it to private contract without special legal recognition or definition (Baltzly 2012). 'Heterosexuality is forcefully imposed and trust upon people due to the constraints of society and not exactly the natural form of sexual preference' (Adrienne Rich).

According to Adrienne Rich, heterosexuality is not so much the natural form of sexual preference but is imposed upon individuals by social constraints. In many Western countries and America, movements by homosexuals have started to legalize their marriages. Across the globe especially in western countries, same sex marriages have become very common. This is known as homosexuality and such marriages which was frowned upon a few decades ago are now being legalised.