Falling in Love: The Past Experiences and Defintion of Love

When asked about love; what love is, who we love, and why we love, it is oftentimes difficult for one to pin-point simple definitions to answer these questions. Is it because no one really knows? Or is it that there is no single correct definition to describe the powerful emotion that we all seek to find? The theme of love being a recent invention helps to further explain why defining and describing love can be such a difficult task. It is important for us to realize that there are many aspects of love to be analyzed. The research done regarding love is crucial to help us as individuals understand the complexity of the topic and how it came about. The first article I chose was 'What kind of love is love at first sight?'. Love and first sight can be a touchy subject, since there are so many opinions on whether it is a true concept or not, and the relation of this concept back to the overall idea of love. The second article I chose was 'Women and Men in Love: Who really feels it and says it first?'.

The scientific aspect of analyzing who says it and feels it first within the relationship is significant in enabling one to understand the general science behind the concept. I felt that these two articles would be the most beneficial in aiding a better understanding of the idea of love as a whole. The purpose of this research study was to analyze love at first sight, and whether or not it was a result of cognitive biases and high passion (Zsok, F., Haucke, M., Wit, C. Y., & Barelds, D. P. 2017). The theme in this case in the broadest aspect, is love, and the analyzations to follow are grasping a better understanding of the theme as a recent invention. To start off, let us understand the idea of love at first sight, LAFS for short. Surely most people know what LAFS is, but not many people believe that it is an actual phenomenon.

It is said that LAFS is just a myth that people push into existence as a way of boosting their relationships with one another, since the literal act of falling in love usually entails some form of cognitive science to explain why you fall for a certain person. But, the topic of cognitive science in the form of cognitive biases; such as the bandwagon effect, can help to explain that people don't necessarily feel LAFS because it actually happened but rather because media outlets and other social constructs portray LAFS as the most ideal and passionate way to fall in love (Zsok, F., Haucke, M., Wit, C. Y., & Barelds, D. P. 2017). Researchers Sangrador and Yela (2000) found that there is a strong correlation between physical attraction and LAFS, and the impact of the halo effect plays a significant role in the perception of LAFS (Zsok, F., Haucke, M., Wit, C. Y., & Barelds, D. P. 2017). Studies were done in three separate situations; dating events where people would meet for the first time, online studies, and laboratory studies.

The two hypotheses; LAFS as a result of cognitive biases and the role of physical attraction, were tested on a total of 396 people with 61.9% women and 38.1% men throughout all aspects of the study. (Zsok, F., Haucke, M., Wit, C. Y., & Barelds, D. P. 2017). In an attempt to match people accurately, participants filled out questionnaire information about themselves and potential partners. Through the use of post questionnaires, it was determined that partners with said high passion reported LAFS more frequently than those who didn’t, and those who met for the first time and had a high physical attraction reported LAFS as well, a total of 49 LAFS encounters (Zsok, F., Haucke, M., Wit, C. Y., & Barelds, D. P. 2017). We can therefore conclude that the typical LAFS occurrence is the result of a preconceived notion regarding the positive end results of LAFS and an intense physical attraction that mimics the feeling of love.

Moving on, the purpose of the second research study was to determine who falls in love and admits to it first in relationships between two people. Majority of people tend to believe that women are the more romantic and sentimental ones in relationships, which tends to lead to them falling in love faster than their partners. In this study, 172 college students provided information on their personal beliefs and experiences on the topic. The research revealed that of those who had past relationship experience, men were found to fall in love more quickly than women, and with that being said, around 64% of men admitted to saying 'I love you' first when compared to 18.51% of women (Harrison, M. A., & Shortall, J. C. 2011).

Within these results, it was recorded that 87.78% of the participants believed that the women fall in love first, and that 75.20% of participants believed that women would be the first to say 'I love you' in the relationship. To further debunk the idea of women falling in love first, women predicted they were inlove with their significant other much later then men did. Almost 9 out of 10 people who have past relationship experience insisted that it is more likely for the woman to fall in love and 7 out of 10 believed the women would express it in a relationship first. Though, the findings proved that men were the ones to fall in love quicker and were three times quicker than women to admit to the love that they feel. From this, we can somewhat conclude that the myth regarding women falling in love faster and being more open with the love they feel is simply just a belief that is not necessarily accurate.

All in all, the research articles studied further proved the idea that love is somewhat of a recent invention. Many of the ideas and myths that myself and many others believe regarding love are not usually the most accurate representations of the concept at all. Love is a rather new concept, and one that is so complex that simple definitions just will not do it justice. As society and cultures continue to grow, the idea of love will only begin to become more complicated, but it is important to remember that in future reference, broadening the horizons of the research methods and those who are involved in these studies will only help to grasp a better understanding of the idea as a whole.